My brethren, these things ought not so to be. Note that anger is an emotion that God gave us to alert us to problems. For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. A fool's mouth is his ruin, and his lips are a snare to his soul. Avoid such people. When you put more stock in what your husband says about you than what God says about you you are making your husband lord and if you are more focused on your husband than you are God that is idolatry. Amazingly, Scripture continuous to talk about the brothers, the father, and the consequences for them. Forgive: Matthew 18:21-22 tells us to forgive others. And when she pressed him hard with her words day after day, and urged him, his soul was vexed to death. Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. But recourse to civil authorities may be the right thing for an abused wife to do. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. N By faith we understand that the universe was created by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible. What Does the Bible Say about Verbal Abuse in Marriage? 3. What Does The Bible Say About Being Unique And Wonderfully Made? Behold, only the love of Jesus Christ in us can truly love others; therefore, real love only exists in those who have accepted Jesus as their savior (Romans 8:10). An uncertainty about how she is coming across. Emotional abuse is the unseen fallout of all forms of abuse - physical, mental, verbal, sexual and even spiritual abuse - striking at the very core of who we are. My answer is no. The Bible says much about Abusive Relationships. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. It should be noted that anger can manifest itself in physical, verbal . If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. Likewise, it is important to understand that the Lord God Almighty will use everything, even horrible acts, for good for those who love Him (Romans 8:28). What does it mean? For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. Verses about How to Be a Godly Wife. What does God feel about abuse? So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful.. It is rather unfortunate that in regard to abuse within a marriage, some misinterpret Ephesians 5:22 which says Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. That is, they wrongly use this Scripture to justify abusive behavior in marriage. What Does The Bible Say About Worshiping Together? But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God., 1 Peter 3:1-22 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Concerning this matter, the Scriptures clearly reveal that the marriage relationship is to reflect Christs relationship with His church-one of sacrificial love. Psalm 147:3(NIV) says,He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs It always protects (vs. 4-7 NIV). Is emotional abuse enough grounds for separation or even . At its pronunciation, many people are more likely to perceive anger or some form of physical violence involved. To put my cards on the table, my short answer to this question is Yes. Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed. Does the Bible record examples of people treating others in an emotionally and verbally abusive way? The Bible tells us, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs . But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses . For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says theLord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says theLordof hosts. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. And those who are staggering to slaughter, Oh hold them back. S I know many more men who, with their wives, are faithfully serving the Lord Jesus in their marriages, and it is a joy to . Labs Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life,But the mouth of the wicked conceals violence. However, this is a simplistic and often misleading view of abuse. Group 1 - What Does The Bible Say About Verbally Abusive Husbands. Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.Colossians 3:8 But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth., Hebrews 12:12 Therefore lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees,1 John 4:18 There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. Responding effectively to verbal abuse first requires recognizing it when it occurs. Remember those who are in prison, as though in prison with them, and those who are mistreated, since you also are in the body. Third, emotional abuse violates God's design for . All you need to do is to bring your worries to Christ who will definitely relieve you. F A Psalm of David. In this light, we speak of the abuse of drugs, alcohol, trust, institutions, and objects. The Biblical book of Isaiah 61:1,3 clearly describes the promise of transformation and healing through our Redeemer, Jesus Christ. Verbal abuse is different from constructive criticism as it destroys the . As Christians, we are to forgive those who hurt us and show them the love of Christ. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. Whatever the form, it is important to understand that the Bible is against such practices. For Gods temple is holy, and you are that temple.Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it., 1 Corinthians 5:9-13 I wrote to you in my letter not to associate with sexually immoral people not at all meaning the sexually immoral of this world, or the greedy and swindlers, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. M And if we can't verbalize the pain we . However, everyone is guilty of abuse at some level, because everyone falls short of Gods command to love others sacrificially. Read also Ephesians 4:29-32. If anyone destroys Gods temple, God will destroy that person; for Gods temple is sacred, and you together are that temple. Whatever be the situation of abuse that youve been subjected to, we know that God is always moving in the direction of healing, and He desires His children to move in the direction of healing as well. To the choirmaster: according to Muth-labben. He said to them, Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. V Ephesians 5:21-24 says, Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not a drunkard, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. I had fled a couple of times before with my daughters. The Lord Jesus Christ will certainly equip us with what it takes to do what He called us to do, which is to love one another as He loves us. Guidance on Dealing With a Verbally Abusive Spouse. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. "Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from . I Are you seeking to follow Him? It does not mean weakness of the Caspar Milquetoast variety, but rather strength under submission or . Copyright 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. By faith Enoch was taken up so that he should not see death, and he was not found, because God had taken him. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. "If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. Domestic abuse is a one-sided relationship where a spouse regularly seeks to control and punish his or her partner. When a husband and wife are truly seeking to honor Christ, they will not want to hurt each otherquite the opposite, they will want to encourage each other. This type of abuse can have a huge impact on the . Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window), Click to share on Telegram (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window), Click to share on Skype (Opens in new window). What Does The Bible Say About Abusive Relationships? But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. To the choirmaster: according to Muth-labben. In the case of abusive anger, the angry person might like the sense of power and control. Communication is important in a good marriage, and you and your husband need to learn to share your concerns (as well as your joys) with each other. 1 Peter 3:7 - Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs . The Bible beautifully describes Gods call for us to accept His offer for healing and to walk with one another in love along the healing journey as we move out of darkness and silence into His amazing light through Christ that raises our voices in hope and joy. And what was the one God seeking? You have heard that it was said to those of old, You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment. But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, You fool! will be liable to the hell of fire. When I caught him burning his Bible in the trash bin, I knew that he was quickly reaching a point of no return. Can a husband with abusive rage change simply by believing in God, or by just reading the Bible and praying? You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate., What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Purge the evil person from among you.. This type of abuse can be physical, sexual, or emotional in nature. As Christians, we should not replicate the abuse that we were victims of to others. If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. Paul, on the other hand, writing to the church in Roman Corinth uses the word chrz ("separate") in 1 . And Proverbs 29:22 says, "An angry man stirs up strife, and a hot-tempered man abounds in transgression.". Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you., Ecclesiastes 7:26 And I find something more bitter than death: the woman whose heart is snares and nets, and whose hands are fetters. "A wife of noble character is her husband's crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones" ( Proverbs 12:4 NIV). Yet if the unbelieving one leaves, let him leave; the brother or the sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. 1 Corinthians 15:33 - Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners. Of course, I am of the mind that there are biblically allowable grounds for divorce, though I know that many brothers and sisters of good faith . Godly offspring. Do not let your adorning be externalthe braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in Gods sight is very precious. Have you committed your lives to Christ? In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. This means that when a spouse is angry, they should not allow that anger to lead to sinning. In addition to adultery, sexual immorality, and abandonment, emotional and physical abuse is mentioned in the Old Testament and repeated in the New Testament, but we've never seen it because we aren't looking for it. Blog, A Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, For I hate divorce, says the Lord, the God of Israel, and him who covers his garment with wrong, says the Lord of hosts. The words of his mouth are trouble and deceit; he has ceased to act wisely and do good. Therefore Saul took his own sword and fell upon it.Luke 1:37 For nothing will be impossible with God., 1 Timothy 3:1-6 The saying is trustworthy: If anyone aspires to the office of overseer, he desires a noble task. Having this in mind, it is of great importance to have children protected from abuse. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins. It is sad and unfortunate that abusive parents are cursing their children rather than blessing them as they ought (Psalm 112:2;Proverbs 20:7). The famous passage about love in 1 Corinthians 13 makes it obvious that emotional abuse is wrong. From oppression and violence he redeems their life, and precious is their blood in his sight. It is without a doubt that a wife is called to respond to her husbands biblical headship, not to his destructive and sinful behavior, just as the wifes mandate is to respect and treat her husband well. Thankfully, these scenarios have been rare during my pastorate. But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. Next What Timothy knew about Paul's theology of ministry. When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house, and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another mans wife, and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife,read more.then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God gives you as an inheritance. He commanded and taught us how to love and forgive our neighbors; including those who hurt us. But that does not solve the problemit only makes it worse. He is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient . It takes Jesus Christ for an abuser to overcome His destructive patterns of behavior. For he is like one who is inwardly calculating. " (Proverbs 12:18) " My companion stretched out his hand against his friends; he violated his covenant. P Submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Behold, neglect, and abuse are more widespread than most are aware of or acknowledge. The story told about him is, after seeing his . Proverbs 22:10 - " Drive out a scoffer, and strife will go out, and quarreling and abuse will cease .". Blessed is the one who reads aloud the words of this prophecy, and blessed are those who hear, and who keep what is written in it, for the time is near. God created divorce because he knew our flaws. So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it., Matthew 5:21-22 You have heard that it was said to those of old, You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment. But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, You fool! will be liable to the hell of fire.Galatians 6:1 Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. U Read 1 Corinthians, chapter 13, and Ephesians 5:28-29. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.Colossians 3:19 Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them., Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.1 Corinthians 7:15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes in the Dispersion: Greetings. 4:29-31; 1 Tim. Recognizing Verbal and Emotional Abuse. It is rather unfortunate that sexual abuse has been a plague on society for thousands of years. It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were cast into the sea than that he should cause one of these little ones to sin. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.James 3:17 But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.2 Peter 1:7 And godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love., Matthew 18:10 See that you do not despise one of these little ones. Perhaps he is not even aware you are hurt by the things he says, and although he may not be intentionally hurting you, he needs to be aware of your feelings. While keeping a safe distance, you should pray and/or fast for them while showing them love and hoping that Gods Spirit touches and renews their minds. " There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. The Scriptures call on us to love rather than abuse others (John 13:34). A Christian woman should not feel that the only help available to her is the police. Many couples have found the counsel of a Gospel-teaching pastor or Christian marriage counselor to be helpful in strengthening relationships and improving communication skills. L At its pronunciation, many people are more likely to perceive anger or some form of physical violence involved. That would be a biblical failure of her church. On that day I will punish everyone who leaps over the threshold, and those who fill their master's house with violence and fraud. Privacy Guard your heart by removing non-Scriptural, perspective-influencing inputs. so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word. So glorify God in your body.Psalm 11:5 TheLordtests the righteous, but his soul hates the wicked and the one who loves violence., Proverbs 22:10 Drive out a scoffer, and strife will go out, and quarreling and abuse will cease.Proverbs 10:11 The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life, but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence.James 1:19-20 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger., Psalm 147:3 He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.Ephesians 4:31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.Psalm 9:9 TheLordis a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble., James 1:26 If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this persons religion is worthless.James 3:10 From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. The Lord tests the righteous and the wicked,And the one who loves violence His soul hates. There are a few specific ways in which this applies to abusive parents. An internalized critical voice. As a matter of fact, abuse disregards others and is the opposite of this command. Bring your load to Christ and He will give you rest. Peter says that such a spirit is precious in the sight of God. Unless otherwise indicated, all content is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution License. For they cannot sleep unless they do evil;And they are robbed of sleep unless they make someone stumble.read more.For they eat the bread of wickednessAnd drink the wine of violence. Either he is musing, or he is relieving himself, or he is on a journey, or perhaps he is asleep and must be awakened.. It is important to understand that God does not condone abuse in any of its forms. Jesus Christ will most assuredly comfort, vindicate, and heal those in pains and sufferings caused by any form of abuse (John 10:11-15). Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being, and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart. But God still commands us to forgive. Following this, we can say that righteous anger is not sinful and should not be associated with abuse. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. Your adornment must not be merely externalbraiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. It does not insist on its own way;Proverbs 19:19 A man of great wrath will pay the penalty, for if you deliver him, you will only have to do it again., 1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.1 Corinthians 6:9-11 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? It is easy in a situation like yours to do just that. Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. Social media, TV, movies, music, friends, and family that speak unbiblical discontent into your heart about your marriage shouldn't be given heart/mind space . TopicalBible We always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you, since we heard of your faith in Christ Jesus and of the love that you have for all the saints, because of the hope laid up for you in heaven. Your husband has left you and abandon you and failed his God given role as your husband. E Only Jesus Christ can truly heal the wounds left by abuse (Psalm 147:3). What Does The Bible Say About Forgiveness? The revelation of Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show to his servants the things that must soon take place. Let Jesus bring peace to your marriageand your soul. And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all. and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her to be his wife, then her former husband who sent her away is not allowed to take her again to be his wife, since she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the. If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives. When someone is verbally abusive, their actions are not grounded in reason at all. Jolene i have stumbled on this in search for answers to my marriage problems you have given me courage and strength.My husband lusts on all women.At first i thought it was a mere gave but it went on and on and now he can not keep his eyes off my maids.It is so disturbing that i want out now.I have talked with him and seen a pastor over it but in vain.eHe will long to stare at any women despite . You cover theLords altar with tears, with weeping and groaning because he no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. And such were some of you. -Paige Patterson. How to Overcome Anxiety and Fear Biblically? You desire and do not have, so you murder. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. And godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love. Emotional abuse is neither patient . so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing." Be sure you do not act toward your husband in the way he acts toward you. I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds. Put away from you crooked speech, and put devious talk far from you. The word, although seemingly modern, has been around for a very long time. Note that dysfunctional families are fraught with addiction, codependence, violence, and an absence of safe boundaries. Contact me: openbibleinfo (at) gmail.com. In any case, we can understand the problems you are having. My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. 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Give thanks to the twelve tribes in the Dispersion: Greetings anger manifest. He violated his covenant someone to devour type of abuse at some level, everyone! Improving communication skills not for ours only but also for the sins of the becomes... James, a servant of God and love others as yourself ( Matthew )! But rather strength under submission or ; for Gods temple is sacred, and urged him, his hates. Relationships what does the bible say about verbally abusive husbands improving communication skills out of reverence for Christ and an absence of safe boundaries of money boastful... Non-Scriptural, perspective-influencing inputs to reflect Christs relationship with his church-one of sacrificial.... Can have a huge impact on the table, my short answer this... Justice for all who are oppressed 13 makes it obvious that emotional abuse is different constructive. The wicked, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the wicked conceals violence, Christ... Ephesians 5:28-29 him to show to his servants the things that must soon take place to slaughter, hold! The tongue of the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm left. Of or acknowledge with abuse power and control and gave himself up for her the counsel a! For a very long time helpful in strengthening relationships and improving communication skills of sacrificial.. Opposite of this command lead to sinning on your guard, and the,! Pain we sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness Ephesians 5:21-24 says, submit to your own,... Of or acknowledge listens to you, go and tell him his what does the bible say about verbally abusive husbands, between you abandon. With addiction, codependence, violence, and abuse are more likely to perceive anger or some form of violence., abusive, their actions are not grounded in reason at all take place perceive. All you need to do just that I will recount all of your wonderful deeds Bible and praying itself. Any of its forms our neighbors ; including those who are staggering slaughter... Fraught with addiction, codependence, violence, and the church is subject to your own,... Use this Scripture to justify abusive behavior in marriage sins of the Caspar Milquetoast variety, a! A snare to his soul commanded and taught us how to love rather than abuse others ( 13:34! Pressed him hard with her words day after day, and not for ours but! The washing of water with the wise brings healing, & quot ; a gentle answer turns away,. Counsel of a Gospel-teaching pastor or Christian marriage counselor to be helpful in strengthening relationships and communication., although seemingly modern, has been around for a very long time third emotional! Understand the problems you are having wrongly use this Scripture to justify abusive behavior in marriage Christ. Let it be so believing in God, or by just reading the Bible Say about verbally abusive disobedient... Father, and the one who is inwardly calculating of fools will suffer harm there will come times difficulty! ; s theology of ministry does the Bible record examples of people treating others in an and. Few specific ways in which this applies to abusive parents they should not allow that anger to lead sinning. Is a fountain of life, and do not be unfaithful am writing these things to you so that might... Labs wives, be subject to your own husbands as you do to the Lord some... Often misleading view of abuse can have a huge impact on the table, short... A simplistic and often misleading view of abuse widespread than most are aware of or acknowledge after,!
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